They're Delicious.

"I love pandas"

I think they're delicious!

Shovel leg.

"Scar on leg from shovel."

Trying the Calvin and Hobbes approach? Do it so badly the first time, you'll never have to bury a body again?

Get a bigger cat.

"My cat was bitten is [sic] half by a bobcat."

Get a bigger cat?

Aaron can be a girl's name, right?

"Likes watching the Notebook"

"Pinch Peeps Noises"

"I can pick things up with this ^my freakishly big space between the big on and the next one. I can also pinch peeps noises." [sic]

This is just too good for words. One of my all-time favorites.

Really Hope This is True

"I was kidnapped in Tijuana" I would be super interested in hearing the story behind this if it's true. Even if it's not, I'd still laugh.

5 Too Many

"I want 5 kids" That's a lot of mouths to feed.